Sarah Palin's Popularity Rises Sharply

The title of David S. Broder's column in The Washington Post today is "Sarah Palin displays her pitch-perfect populism." Mr. Broder reported, "When [Chris Wallace of FOX News] asked her what role she wants to play in the country's future, she said:

"First and foremost, I want to be a good mom, and I want to raise happy, healthy, independent children. And I want them to be good citizens of this great country.

"And then I do want to be a voice for some common-sense solutions. I'm never going to pretend like I know more than the next person. I'm not going to pretend to be an elitist. In fact, I'm going to fight the elitist, because for too often and for too long now, I think the elitists have tried to make people like me and people in the heartland of America feel like we just don't get it, and big government's just going to have to take care of us. Well, maybe some of us don't get it, but big business has been taking care of us just fine.

"The time for big government is over, except for the military, the only part of the government that works. As bad as the incompetent elitists who run most of our government are, that is how good the regular folks in the military are. The elitists pretend that we're all in danger of getting sick or going broke or having some big businessman stick his hand in our pants. That's just not true. Many more people die from terror, as a result of foreigners doing stuff like putting explosives in their underpants and blowing up buildings because this government is not protecting us.  Maybe martial law until this emergency is over would be the right thing to do.  I don't pretend to know.

"What I do know is we love liberty. But there are foreigners, those who are different from us normal, common-sense people, who want to take it away. The elitists who ask, 'What did we do to deserve this?' hate America. We are not perfect, but we almost are. We never did anything to deserve what they've done to us and want to do to us. They want to take our liberty. They want to take our God. That's why we're at war, why we've been in a state of emergency, making wartime sacrifices for almost ten years. That's why we must make small sacrifices, such as not criticizing our brave military or putting regulations on our businesses. Our economy was doing just fine until we overregulated and caused the problems we have now. George Bush would've solved the problem by now. That's why we've got to get rid of Obama and the other Democrats who have caused these problems.

"You see, a big part of the problem is when you get these people who aren't heartland people. You know, like Indians or Mexicans or blacks. They get money from big government and go get things like Cadillacs and fancy degrees, like in science or something, and get a good affirmative action job and think they're elite and better than the rest of us who built this country and love it. We slaved to make this country the home of the free and the land of the brave. It's our country, and it shouldn't be taken over by elites."

A recent poll shows that many Americans are responding to Sarah Palin's message. It is not very surprising that whites and retards, most of whom are against progressive agendas like evolution and getting power directly from the sun without going through 6,000 year old fossil fuels, really like what Ms. Palin is saying. It is a persuasive message, one that many heartland people wholeheartedly have taken to heart. That is the reason for the sharp rise in her popularity among many Americans.

Elites may disagree, but we won't go into that now, since this really isn't their country. Palin also has not yet won over some of the non-elites. For example, Josh "The Ponceman" Perry, charismatic star of "Retarded Policeman," who is both white and retarded, stated that the poor memory Ms. Palin demonstrates by having to write notes on her hand disturbs him profoundly. He said, "They would have fired me a long time ago if I couldn't remember my lines, and the scripts in my films are far more complex than her speeches." When I told him that Mr. Broder gave Ms. Palin a vote of confidence, stating, "Those who want to stop her will need more ammunition than deriding her habit of writing on her hand. The lady is good." Mr. Perry conceded, "Yes she is, for a f#!%ing retard."